The Man

by Teddy Kumpel

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    if you download the whole album you get the special super dooper bonus track "You Come To My Country", a heartfelt ditty about imported lovers

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credits

released November 22, 2008

THE MAN

produced by Teddy Kumpel and Tony Scherr.
basic tracks recorded on 8 track 1/2" analog at Tony's house. overdubs and mixed at Teddy's house in Pro Tools TDM through Dangerous Music 2-buss.
Mastered by Gene Paul at DBPlus

Leslie Mendelson (vocals), Tony Scherr (bass, guitar, vocals) Rob Jost (bass, french horn, vocals) Abe Speller (drums) Chris Brown (organ) Andy Ezrin (Keys) Michael Blake (horn arr. and tenor sax) Briggan Kraus (bari sax) Eric Beyondo (trumpet and very hi vocals) Jeni Fuljita, Kate Fenner, Kate Sullivan (backing vocals), Tony Barba, Brook Martinez (backing vocals)

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Track Name: The Man
THE MAN - teddy kumpel

you the man, you the muthafuckin man
keepin me down everytime you can

mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say
mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say for yourself
what do ya got to say

you die in my dreams most every night
i go to extremes in my life
I got to come clean it'd be the same if you were gone

you the man, you the muthafuckin man
keepin me down everytime you can

mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say
mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say for yourself
what do ya got to say

I cried for so long I ran out of tears
What's left in my heart a good career
still can't stick around when you're here

you the man, you the muthafuckin man
keepin me down everytime you can

mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say
mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say for yourself
what do ya got to say

don't want your dirty money
just leave it all to her
all i ever needed was a minute of your time

you the man, you the muthafuckin man
keepin me down everytime you can

mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say
mean mathematically minded man
what do ya got to say for yourself
what do ya got to say
Track Name: The Other Side
THE OTHER SIDE - teddy kumpel

Tired without reason she is lonely on the other side
lazy little squirrles are the only friends she has to confide in
makes herself a promise catch a rainbow when the knot is tied
then she'll know the answer why he's hiding on the other side

the other side
that's where he goes when she's been good to him
the other side
that's where he goes when things get bad
he's never sad when he's on the other side

she needs a love injection looking for to shine her light
makes herself a sandwich hoping he'll get hungry for a bite
when it isn't working and he's in there deep into the night
that's when she starts her moaning "baby, when you gonna take some time" from

then he starts to wonder where she is
he knows why he's in love with her when she leaves him there on the other side

the other side
that's where he goes when she's been good to him
the other side
that's where he goes when things get bad
he's never sad when he's on the other side
Track Name: Remember The Alimony
REMEMBER THE ALIMONY - John Schnall/Teddy Kumpel

If you found the right girl and your love's really true
walkin down that aisle's the best thing to do
cause you'll be together forever
but if you don't keep all the vows that you take
and it all turns out to be a mistake
you know you can'tjust forget her

So remember the alimony, don't jump in too fast
if it's not real love it could cost you real cash
remember the alimony
think about it alot
cause it ain't so easy to untie that knot

when you take that big step
you wanna be sure
what you feel is a love so pure
you just know it's meant to be
but if your marriage gets all confused
you might have pay some serious dues
and you could end up broke like me

So remember the alimony, don't jump in too fast
if it's not real love it could cost you real cash
remember the alimony
think about it alot
cause it ain't so easy to untie that knot

so please make sure
you take your time
search your heart and soul
and keep my advice in mind

So remember the alimony, don't jump in too fast
if it's not real love it could cost you real cash
remember the alimony
think about it alot
cause it ain't so easy to untie that knot
Track Name: I'd Grow a Moustache for You
I'd Grow a Moustache For You - teddy kumpel

I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
all day
kiss me all day

my skin is too damn sensitive
can't shave it everyday
but when I don't I'm leavin marks
so red upon your awesome upper lip
and your chin starts peeling off

I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
all day
kiss me all day

those tiny microscopic hairs
would be our enemies
we'd cut some off and let some stay
but only where the damage can be done
so we can have our fun

I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
all day
kiss me all day

I'd spend my time
trying to find the perfect length
can't see you crying in pain
no no no

I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
I'd grow a moustache for you
not to scratch your face when we kiss all day
all day
kiss me all day
Track Name: You Say I Don't Like Girls
You Say I Don't Like Girls - teddy kumpel

your songs are all complaints,
don't cha have some good things to say?
you got so many words and so many tricks
that they don't fit up your sleeve no more

yer band's full of mystery men
who lack personality
their anonomous nature could empty a theatre
full of fans that you'll never see
fans that you'll never see

I don't hate you, but you must hate yourself, baby

you say I don't like girls
when it's really that I can't stand you
you think you rocked my world,
well I'm sorry but it isn't true

yer butt's as hard as steel, feels so unnatural
you got too much cusion and not enough pushin
think yer lovin but it's hard to tell

yer gut's about to burst but no one will ever know
you'll hold it in till it turns to worse
and you're scared of letting go
scared of letting go

you say I don't like girls
when it's really that I can't stand you
you think you rocked my world,
well I'm sorry but it isn't true

I don't hate you, but you must hate yourself, baby

you say I don't like girls
when it's really that I can't stand you
you think you rocked my world,
well I'm sorry but it isn't true

I'm over you,
but I heard your song about me on the internet
when it got the bridge I laughed
and then I sighed
cuz I knew that I'd have to write a song
right back to you
Track Name: My Depressing Music
My Depressing Music - teddy kumpel

sentimental wandering melodies
drive me so fuckin crazy
they never end up getting anywhere
I question why they were written anyway

wasn't for the uplift ot the soul
probably not for the money
this sour harmony is gettin old
I'll have to pass it on to you
and your friends can have some too

put on my my depressing music,
feel all your pain
you'll survive your own bad weather
come in from the rain
and put on my depressing music,
dance around the room
if you're like me you'll get sick
and tomorrow's fun songs won't come too soon

always wondered why I got so bored
listening to all the lyrics
had to blame it on myself
why can't I hear it no more
so if you're sad you can have mine

put on my my depressing music,
feel all your pain
you'll survive your own bad weather
come in from the rain
and put on my depressing music,
dance around the room
if you're like me you'll get sick
and tomorrow's fun songs won't come too soon
Track Name: We've Got Chemistry
We've Got Chemistry - teddy kumpel

she's a blue blooded girl
in a third world
got a pet squirrel and navel ring
got a gtr and she started to sing

strike a sexy pose
cute button nose
turnin me on in the fish net hose
turnin me on in the fish net hose
getting me hard when the wind blows

I like her
she likes me
I'd say we've got chemistry

she got a college degree
she's a queen bee
looking at her just sets me free
looking at her now I'm free
got a guarantee that I can stay myself

I like her
she likes me
I'd say we've got chemistry
Track Name: I'm It, For Now
I'm It, For Now - teddy kumpel

She spent the night with it
she loved the sight of it
she felt alrght with it
she came in a second with it
she had her way with it

she had too much fun with
she rode her bike with it
she said nice things to it
she made out in the corner with it
she had her way with it

but now she's giving it up for me
I can't believe she's giving it up for me
cause I can't see what she sees in me
i guess I'll never know why

I'm it now
I'm it now
I'm it now
I'm it
I'll be it for now

she became obsessed with it
she tried to control it
she had a talk with it
she analyzed every part of it
she had her way with it

but now she's giving it up for me
I can't believe she's giving it up for me
cause I can't see what she sees in me
i guess I'll never know why

I'm it now
I'm it now
I'm it now
I'm it
I'll be it for now

for now I'll be there till she gets the roving eye for it again
Track Name: My Country
My Country - teddy kumpel

what the heck do you think you're doing to my country?
you don't represent me
you'll never understand me
you didn't even count the votes to see if you're supposed to be there?
and now we're living in a nightmare
and you don't care

First you tell me everybody
thinks the same way as you think
have you had a few drinks
well... something stinks
then you got the balls to ask me if I'm patriotic?
this antibiotic
will keep you cool

are we really too lazy for a revolution?
we can get it up to boot these fools?
we can't let them get away with this
slap the handcuffs on my wrists
I refuse to to be scared

what the heck does he think he's doing to my country?
he doesn't represent me
he'll never understand me
they didn't even count the votes to see if he's supposed to be there?
and now we're living in a nightmare
and they don't care
Track Name: You'll Have To Clone Me
You'll Have To Clone Me - teddy kumpel

didn't like what you said the first time we kissed
I should have listened to you take a piss
on yourself as a lover
I didn't know you were true when you confessed
we could of had a good time
instead of the mess we created
we coulda had another

I know you're thinking of leaving
can't figure why you keep on bleeding me

so you'll have clone me if you want me
cause I can't see you anymore
I'll be relaxing under this tree
as you see him out the door
instead of me instead of me instead of me

don't like when I find when i reminisce
and I don't mean that as total dis
it takes two to be dumb
I don't remember what was said except for this
I don't know if love even exists for you when you come

I know you're thinking of leaving
can't figure why you keep on teasing me

so you'll have clone me if you want me
cause I can't see you anymore
I'll be relaxing under this tree
as you see him out the door
instead of me instead of me instead of me
Track Name: The Exotic Island Of Long
The Exotic Island of Long - teddy kumpel

she lies in the ocean that nutured her greed
a brookyn brain montauk at her feet
but in her belly's a terrible shame
she gave up on life got addicted to pain

she's so mediocre
she deserves her own song
the exotic island of long

she sucks the life out of many a soul
with her miles of strip malls and kids on the dole
ya some go to college as a means of escape
from the lady who's famous for horrible taste

she's so mediocre
she deserves her own song
the exotic island of long

now some say she's pretty some say she feeds
on the chests of women who live in her sleeves
I'd say she's the victim of culture and waste
she sure has changed since the Shinnecock days

she's so mediocre
she deserves her own song
the exotic island of long

I think she'll be alright as long as I leave
and visit her softly while everyone sleeps
Track Name: Time is a Magazine
Time Is A Magazine - teddy kumpel

I see the men in their white suits coming
coming to take me away
one's got a needle, the other's got a jacket
gonna try and make me go straight
I said, "I didn't kill those people
just had to drink some blood
I'm a jealous, lonely creature
I wanna die before I'm old too
I wanna die before I'm old"

to you time is a magazine
you're rushing rushing rushing
to get to the end
I might need to lick you clean
after I do you in

try to grab me, render me helpless
too slow, can't get to me
I move like a floating bullet
hovering past them in triple speed
relax, i didn't do no damage
c'mon, I wouldn't be that bold
I was thirsty so i did what I had to do
careful don't get too close
don't get too close

to you time is a magazine
you're rushing rushing rushing
to get to the end
I might need to lick you clean
after I do you in